C-130 Hercules... those big gunships, with the cannon poking out the side... those are cool. If you don't know what I'm talkin 'bout, it's the one from the first Transformers movie that shot up the scorpion kill-bot in the sand. Yes, that's it.
What if we were to engineer non-lethal ammunition for the C-130H that could disperse huge quantities of all-natural bacon-bits over acres at a time in a single attack? It would be glorious! The tail-gunner would be feeding one end of the bandoleer into the cannon and the other into his mouth.
Better yet, a heavy bomb payload for the B-2! Code named: "The Stealth Porker", as I believe "Ninja Swine" is already taken.
"What's that?! Up in the sky! It's the Baco-Bomb and lordy it smells delicious! Quick kids, get out there with your buckets!"
Instead of ducking for cover and dying in horrible fiery explosions anyway, pork loving people could instead quickly prepare salads and run outside to hold them towards the heavens! Yes!
Also it would make bomb disposal much easier during peacetime. The explosive ordinance disposal techs would all be chubby, with little canisters of croutons on their utility belts next to their multi-tools.
During wartime however, it would be devastating against those with aversions to pork technology. That's for a variety of reasons of course, not the least of which being the fact that the ammo would be fresh from the kitchens, so there would still be a good deal of hot grease involved.
TSN
1 comment:
Interesting pondering, my friend...
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