Career Choices

Every once in a while I remember that there are people out there doing things that I haven't the foggiest idea about.  There are people who have dedicated their entire careers to studying things that I've never even heard of, or at least never gave a second thought to. 

Here's what I imagine it would be like for me to accidentally attend a gathering of such people: 

**I stroll into an auditorium full of folks, completely lost in a casino hotel, casually munching on a Philly cheese-steak sandwich.  I sit down in the back row, fully expecting to be kicked out at any moment for not wearing shoes.  I'm right on time.  The guy behind the podium starts talking.

"Welcome to this evenings seminar on the effects of densely focused ionized particle beams on the feelings of common household furniture.  I'll get started with an experiment we've all used as a warm-up in our labs, just to get things moving." 

**He walks over to a gnarly old couch which takes up a good bit of the stage.  He reaches into the cushions and pulls out a large cauliflower, which he places into a giant cauldron of bubbling liquid.  I begin to get nervous.

"The rechthiomyms in this radish broth are now infiltrating the recently reclined vegetable, which will (as you all know) cause any loose sofius detritus to become infused with pan-substantial mucoids." 

**I wake up seventeen hours later in a crappy diner with two phone numbers and a calculus equation scrawled on my face in lipstick.  I order coffee and waffles. 

Knowing everything would only be cool for a little while, after that it'd be pretty boring. 

It's good to know that there are people out there doing things to which I will probably forever remain oblivious. 

Maybe you're one of those people!  That would be cool. 

TSN